This will be my last post for the Happier book. I hope all of you have enjoyed reading it as much as I have. This book has caused me to seriously reflect on who I am, and how I spend my time. I had never considered the idea that happiness really is the ultimate currency or that it can be considered currency at all. I'm convinced now, though, that Ben - Shahar is dead-on with this concept. Not only should I be trying to build my own wealth of happiness, I can do so by sharing it with others--the old pass it on idea. I love the quotation at the beginning of chapter 15 by Oliver Wendell Holmes. “The world has to learn that the actual pleasure derived from material things is of rather low quality on the whole and less even in quantity than it looks to those who have not tried it.” How many of us are guilty of accumulating stuff just for the sake of having it? How many of us have fallen for the trap of believing that a purchase or an acquisition will brighten our lives? I certainly have. Ben - Shahar writes on page 161, “The need to bring others down comes from a materialistic perception of a world in which resources are a zero-sum game and one's success implies another's failure, where one's gain is another's loss.” We do not gain ultimate currency from the destruction of others. Quite the opposite; we help ourselves by helping others.
In the conclusion Ben - Shahar emphasizes the core point of his argument. He says, "One of the common barriers to happiness is the false expectation that one thing--a book or a teacher, a princess or a Knight, an accomplishment, a prize, or a revelation--will bring us eternal bliss. While all these things can contribute to our well-being, at best they form a small part of the mosaic of a happy life." We all have the ability and the opportunity, especially in this country, to live in contentment. Unfortunately few of us take advantage of it. I had a friend from Spain stay at my house for a while several years ago. He could not get over how big our houses are, how cheap our utilities are, how stocked our grocery stores are, and, yet, how little we seemed to appreciate all of it. The fact of the matter is that materialism does not ensure happiness. Ben - Shahar states it best when he writes, "We are living a happy life when we derive pleasure and meaning while spending time with our loved ones, or learning something new, or engaging in a project at work. The more our days are filled with these experiences, the happier we become. This is all there is to it."
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
2 comments:
Just as Willis, I've also been reflecting on myself; I don't think you could read this book and not do so. On page 161 Ben-Shahar writes, "The quantity of happiness is not fixed: an abundance of happiness for one person or country does not deprive another," which, even though it's opposite, reminded me of what Willis said about money; that when one person earns a dollar, another loses one. I think placing what Ben-Shahar said next to what Willis told us shows the difference between happiness perception and material perception along with portraying both the positive-sum game and the zero-sum game.
The last page of the conclusion Ben-Shahar writes, "To realize, to make real, life's potential for the ultimate currency, we must first accept that 'this is it'- that all there is to life is the day-to-day, the ordinary, the details of the mosaic. We are living a happy life when we derive pleasure and meaning while spending time with our loved ones, or learning something new, or engaging in a project at work. the more our days are filled with these experiences, the happier we become. This is all there is." This paragraph was inspiring. My favorite part is the very last line; "This is all there is." That, I believe, could help people break away from the fantasy world and stick with "our world." Maybe it's just me, but I thought ending on that note was very powerful.
*On page 166, Ben-Shahar's friend Kim said, "The calmness has to be inside. If you're happy, that happiness is transportable- you take it with you everywhere you go. Not that external isn't significant, but it doesn't make us happy." That sounded beautiful. It also made me think of how Ben-Shahar discussed how this "happiness revolution" is an internal one; that the change is a mental one.
*Page 161, "When a crab attempts to get out of the pot, the other crabs pull it back in- not because pulling it down will help them get out but because they do not want the other crab to get out while they boil." Thinking of people in that way was disturbing. Although people aren't literally pulling others back into boiling water, they're bringing them down and causing damage.
*Page 158, third paragraph- "Winston Churchill once commented that, 'The inherent vice of capitalism is the unequal sharing of blessings; the inherent virtue of socialism is the equal sharing of miseries." I thought Bus would enjoy this.
I thoroughly enjoyed reading HAPPIER. I had my doubts on happiness being any sort of a big deal, but I've learned a lot; not only about the ultimate currency, but also about myself. I'd love my mom and sisters to read this book. I think they'd get a lot out of it as well.
Chapter 15, page 159
Aristotle once wrote "happiness is the meaning and purpose of life, the whole aim and end of human existence". This quote reminds me that I need to stop putting so much worry on things others think bring happiness, like material possession. I want to stop relying on new "toys" to bring me happiness, and focus on things that generally make me happier. I find I stress more about life if I am worried about what i do and do not have.
Post a Comment